This summer we’ve been studying biology and botany. Well, sort of.
You see, I have a yucca plant that won’t die. In fact, it only multiplies. So my husband and the children have been experimenting with different Killing Methods.
Ever since we moved out here, in the country, we’ve had a yucca plant problem. The previous owners of our place willingly (and stupidly) planted this horrible, indestructible thing. So the first and second year we just hacked the thing off at the ground, naively hoping it would disappear in the spring. And it did no such thing.
The third year, my husband got the spade out and violently slashed at the roots and wrenched out big hunks of that deplorable plant. I was quite hopeful that it would be gone.
Alas. My hopes were in vain. The thing only multiplied; thus receiving it’s new name The Hydra. (You are familiar with Hercules and the Hydra Dragon? You cut off one head and several more appear. Unbelievable.) This Hydra-Yucca-Plant is threatening to take over my whole garden.
Last summer, I gave the 8-year-old twins a tank of extra-strong, undiluted Round-Up and a sprayer. Their job was to kill it. Hence, botany as summer school – good idea, right?
Well, the twins failed and through no fault of their own. It just kept popping up all over the place.
This summer the twins have been giving me reports on It. “Hey Mom, do you want us to pull Those Plants out? Or should we get the Round-Up?” And, “Mom, there’s more of ’em!” And finally, “Mom, you wouldn’t believe it, but now they’re popping up on the other side of those railroad ties!”
And so, I give up. This year, the Hydra-Yucca-Plant gets to live. It’s a tragedy.
The picture below is a full-grown yucca plant in the wild, where it belongs.
P.S. This is such an ugly plant. It belongs only in deserts. It’s pretty much like a worthless cactus anyway, with it sharp spears. And ugliness. No offense to anyone out there who actually likes these indestructible things. For I suppose they do offer a little green to an otherwise brown landscape.