Our family has great news: Miss Severed Fingers is whole again! It’s been a little over two weeks since her calamitous encounter with a folding chair wherein one finger was dangling by the skin and another was sliced through the bone. These fingers, however, haven taken nicely. A couple of days ago she had all sixteen stitches removed.
It was quite the ordeal, though, having those sixteen stitches yanked out. Miss Severed Fingers screamed bloody murder during the entire clipping and tugging, especially when the doctor had to forcefully wrestle with the ones stuck in her nail beds.
We had a very sympathetic nurse, whose job it was to hold sharp-looking implements for the doctor. She kept smiling and crooning, “Oh, Honey, you’re doing such a good job! Just a few more!” Whereupon Miss Severed Fingers wailed even louder, and I snickered and interiorly rolled my eyes. Doing a good job? Humph. Four-year-olds. Everyone in this hospital is wondering what kind of hellish operation is happening in this back room.
But I did my part to console The Poor, Afflicted Thing too. I said, “Honey Babydoll, calm down! I’ll buy you a lovely coffee afterwards!”
The Little Dear quickly turned her teary, blue eyes towards me, and whimpered, “Really?”
“Of course, Honey. Coffee fixes nearly everything, you know.”
And so that’s what we did. After her little fingers were re-bandaged, we drove straight to Moka Coffee. Miss Severed Fingers ordered an iced vanilla latte; I had a hot cappuccino with a much deserved extra shot of espresso.
Notice the delectable donut? The Coffee Check-Out Lady was so impressed with Miss Severed Fingers that she even threw in the donut for free, along with a tootsie roll. For you see, Miss Severed Fingers rolled her window down from the backseat and stuck her damaged digits out for the Coffee Lady to admire. She even graciously wiggled them too.
Then we drove to the Post Office. She showed her bandaged extremities to the Post Office Lady, and you guessed it, the Post Office Lady was mighty impressed with her cuteness and gave her two suckers–one for each afflicted hand.
Oh, what a day!